I had a big time crush. We lived apart by thousands of miles. Lots of long distance phone conversations, back when you had to “pay” for long distance. Lots of fantasizing, sexualizing, communing by phone, filled my mind with obsessive aggrandized thinking.
After much anticipation, right around holiday time, our next “meeting” occurred. There was lots of chemistry in the air. We had only a few short days together. The pressure was on. However, the timing of the ebb and flow of ‘readiness’ or lack thereof never quite matched. When I was ready, he wasn’t. I was disappointed. I had all kinds of agendas in my mind and I’m sure he did too. Consummation of the intimate fantasy did not occur.
So I let go, surrendered my desires, my expectations, my fantasies of how I would change my life to be with him. Letting go made space for me to see the whole picture with more clarity, more objectivity. It didn’t look so perfect after all. Then he was ready and now I wasn’t. He scrambled to entice me to stay longer, miss my plane. No! Now I couldn’t get out of there fast enough! The fantasy bubble had burst. I needed a reality check, to slow down and relax out of my impulsivity.
I heard this quote in a 12 step meeting once, “An expectation is a pre-meditated disappointment.” We can’t help it. When visualizing our holiday happiness its part of natural preparation. When we obsessively find our mind fantasizing about an expectation, we are OUT of present time. Temper your mind, reign in your thoughts, bring your awareness into your immediate environment, ground the mind in the body, spend some time in stillness – meditate.
With the impending holiday, are you expecting depression, chaos, arguments, stress, and resistance?
Are you expecting excitement, love, anticipation, reunions?
If an expectation gets met, what follows immediately is greed for more.
If an expectation isn’t met, it’s followed by disappointment.
Neither greed nor disappointment feel very good. Practice whole hearted acceptance. Practice gratitude, practice balance.
Have a peace filled, centered holiday.
Join us to strengthen your peace filled, center with a new year’s meditation. Mark your calendar NOW for our New Years Meditation and Ritual event, January 3rd, 11-12:30 pm, 2016!
Director: Lionheart Institute of Transpersonal Energy Healing
- Temper your mind
- Reign in your thoughts
- Bring your awareness into your immediate environment
- Ground the mind in the body
- Spend some time in stillness – meditate.